Strange experience

I had an odd experience today, not unpleasant, I just felt funny about it afterwards. Me, Katie and Ben have been going to a baby/toddler group for around 4 months now. Around half way through today's session, a mother I'd never seen before came in with her daughter, she seemed to know some of the other mothers. I was around 90% sure that the girl had Down syndrome. She was lovely. Since I wasn't 100%, I didn't say anything, but I couldn't stop looking at her. I was trying to recognise some of the more prominent features for "confirmation", eyes, nose, palmar crease, how the little pinky finger curves inwards... I know I was staring, I couldn't help myself. I also know some children have very subtle features, hence I didn't want to open my mouth if I was wrong! It was strange as I don't see many kids Jack's age and he is so far behind his peers even, I was really happy to watch her running and playing with the other kids, feeding her doll. Not because it was anything out of the ordinary for her, it was totally normal (whatever that is) child behaviour, but just for me and what DS means to Jack. I'm not making any sense whatsoever here. I think what I'm trying to say is it *seems* more of a disability to Jack due to his level of development, although I know he has other diagnoses (is that the plural??), so that has skewed how I see things. Before he was born I fully expected that he'd do all the things that any other child could do, just on his own time-scale. As he got older, it became more obvious that that was not the case and maybe there are some things he won't ever be able to do. Since he is all I know, it just seems strange to me that there was this little kid, I'd guess she was early 3 years, so far ahead of him that she seemed extraordinary, but she is the one who is "typical". I have no idea what I'm going on about or what I'm trying to say.

The fact is, she was a delight to watch. Truly. I did get a little bit pensive, wondering if I'd ever see Jack doing those things and questioning why he was hit with so much (cerebral palsy, hydrocephalus, club foot, heart defect, tube feeding, blah blah blah). I was also very conscious that her mother was probably thinking "wth is your problem? Why are you looking at my kid like that?!". I couldn't strike up a conversation with her though. If I see her again, I definitely will, especially as I don't know anyone "in real life" to talk with.